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aa
Hellooooooooo ..
A Blonde enters a store that sells curtains. She
tells the salesman, "I would like to buy a pair of
pink curtains". The salesman assures her that
they have a large selection of pink curtains. He shows
her several patterns, but the blonde seems to be having
a hard time choosing. Finally she selects a lovely pink
floral print. The salesman then asks what size
curtains
she needs.
The blonde promptly replies, "fifteen
inches". "Fifteen inches???", asked
the salesman. "That sounds very small, what room
are they for?" The blonde tells him that they
aren't for a room, they are for her computer monitor.
The surprised salesman replies, "but Miss,
computers do not need curtains!"
The blonde says "Hellooooooooo .. I've got
Windoooows!"
hm
The Human Mind
This is not my poor typing. Read on....
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd
waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan
mnid Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy,
it deson't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod
are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat
ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl
mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs
is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by
istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig
newcon
Your
New Conversion Table Explained:
for all you engineers who have difficulty converting
units.
1. Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter
= Eskimo Pi
2. 2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton
3. 1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope
4. Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the
pavement = 1 bananosecond
5. Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram
6. Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile
per hour = Knotfurlong
7. 16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Serling
8. Half of a large intestine ! = 1 semicolon
9. 1,000,000 aches = 1 megahurtz
10. Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower
11.Shortest distance between two jokes = A straight line
12. 453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake
13. 1 million microphones = 1 megaphone
14. 2 million bicycles = 2 megacycles
15. 365.25 days = 1 unicycle
16. 2000 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbirds
17. 52 cards = 1 decacards
18. 1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 Fig Newton
19. 1000 milliliters of wet socks = 1 literhosen
20. 1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche
21. 1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin
22. 10 rations= 1 decoration
23. 100 rations = 1 C-ration
24. 2 monograms = 1 diagram
25. 4 nickels = 2 paradigms
26. 2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at
Yale University Hospital = 1 IV League
27. 100 Senators = Not 1 decision

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